Why Every Single Woman Wants to Date a Married Man: Jana Hocking

Something caught my eye this week that revealed a deep, dark and shameful secret about single women.

Many of us—okay, let me clarify, not me (for once)—seem to be like a bull for a red rag when it comes to married men.

It seems that a wedding ring is seen as a challenge by many people. Shame, shame, shameful behavior.

You don’t believe me? I have proof.

You see, it all started during my weekly Saucy Secrets Instagram feed, which I host every Monday evening. One guy wrote and said, “I’ve been married for 2.5 years and I’ve never been approached by so many women. When I was single, I barely noticed. I don’t like the attention, but is it normal?”

It piqued my interest, so I took a poll asking, “Men … have you noticed more women hitting on you after marriage?” and the results were wild. More than 10,000 men responded to the survey, with 74 percent saying yes.

Here I am, looking for a cute, single guy to float my boat, and my single sisters are winking and nodding at married men.

No girl, no.

One of my female followers had an interesting take on the trend in my DMs, saying; “That’s because his wife has upgraded him, probably got him a new wardrobe and skin care routine.” Which made me laugh, but also, I think she has a point.

I know I’ve mentioned this before, but my friends and I are constantly outraged by the high percentage of single men with poor hygiene. Whether it’s bad breath, smelly bedrooms, dirty dishes in the sink or a lack of ironing, many simply seem to lack the basics. Toothbrush, guys – use it.

So I think she’s onto something.

A look around any office at the moment will show you a Single Steve reheating last night’s Chinese takeout for lunch while wearing a crumpled shirt he found on his bedroom floor, while Married Martin arrives in a suit neatly printed with a careful and wholesome packaging. lunch made by his charming wife.

Okay, that might be a bit of an exaggeration, but it’s not too far from the truth. Am I right, ladies?

But upon further thought, I believe there’s a deeper reason for this appeal to men, and it’s quite simple.

It comes down to the lure of stability and success. These guys give off an air of having it all together – financially stable, emotionally mature and even more attractive, they’re clearly not afraid of commitment.

A man with a wedding ring symbolizes someone who is not afraid to say “let’s end the relationship” – he literally walked down the aisle to prove it. In today’s dating landscape, this can seem like a unicorn. Just getting someone in a situation to agree to be a proper boyfriend is an almighty endeavor these days.

So, as much as I hate to admit it, it makes sense that this “spousal hunting” is happening in our bars and workplaces.

In fact, don’t take my word for it. There’s real experimental evidence that single women are going gaga over other people’s partners — according to a report in Journal of Experimental Social Psychology.

It found that 90 percent of single women admitted to being attracted to a man they believed was already taken, while only 59 percent were interested if he was single.

Ladies, this man is not your man. It belongs to someone else, and we have to respect it (annoyingly).

For those who speak The first women’s clublet me put it this way – we want to be Goldie Hawn in this situation, not Sarah Jessica Parker.

So maybe our alternative is to stick with singles. Pick one that catches your eye, take him on a date to the nearest menswear store, teach him how to throw a load of laundry into the machine, and gift him a toothbrush just to say, “thinking of you.” Cute, isn’t it?

The excuse “but all good things are taken” will no longer cut it. We must train these lonely mutts and turn them into glorious hounds. Oh, I can hear the comments section filling up with rage already.

Sit down boy, sit down.

Jana Hocking is a columnist and aggregator @jana_hocking